The Bath

I celebrated my husband’s last day off work before returning to work by taking a bath. I know many of you, especially those with young kids, might not know what this is. Let me explain–that large empty basin-like thing in your bathroom?? No? Don’t have time to go look? Just trust me on this one, it’s there. This tub can actually be filled with warm water and you can sit in it and just soak. And not do anything else. And try to relax. I know. I KNOW. And even better, I know this isn’t some sort of urban legend, b/c I actually did this myself. Taking a bath is a real thing and with a little work and careful planning, it can be done in your very own home. If you want to go really crazy, add bubbles–my son has some Elmo-scented ones you can borrow (side note: what the?? how can something be “Elmo-scented? What exactly does a decades-old red puppet smell like and why do I want to capture this scent?) For bath novices, you may want to start small–maybe just soak for a few minutes so you don’t overwhelm all of your senses. But regardless of the length of your bath, above all you must respect the bath code. This requires verbally fending off (use your “Mommy’s angry” voice as necessary) anyone (spouse, child, or pet) that comes nears the bathroom door and threatens your water-logged bliss. Your defense is that you are cleansing yourself. This is still generally accepted as a necessary task, despite the carefully crafted brainwashing of those who underwrite the SAHM world that “a little spit-up in your hair isn’t so bad” and “nobody is going to get close enough to smell you anyway.” May the bath live on.

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Meredith

Meredith blogs at The Mom of the Year, where she dedicatedly earns her title one epic parenting fail at a time, offering quick, relatable laughs for fellow parents and all their empathizers. She has been part of several best-selling anthologies, featured on prominent sites such as Huffington Post, In the Powder Room and BlogHer, and loves her role as the Executive VP/Operations Manager of The BlogU Conference. When she's not breaking up fights over Legos and juice boxes, she remains fully committed to sharing a less serious look at the world of parenting.

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